Setting an example

He was playing with his younger brother in the playroom. 

Me: Kor kor, how old are you?

Boy: I'm am 8.

Me: Oh...this playroom is for kids aged 6 and below. But you can go to the library section to read some books. 

Boy: 😊 (ran away to get his bag. Then, sat beside his parents and took out a book from his bag to read.) 

I was amazed at his obedience. I found complete obedience in him without any struggles. He didn't doubt on what I had said. He also didn't return to the play area which he was forbid to enter. He simply OBEYED. 

His parents? They were the one that cleaned the table after each meal. Quiet, elegant yet shines like the lamp that mentioned in the Bible. I believe this is the type of Christians that God wants us to be: 

"Let your light shine before men, so that they may see your good works and give glory to your Father in heaven."

Matthew 5:16

The parents need not be loud. They just need to shine and be examples for the children to follow. They're my cell group member and today, before we went out for Sunday service, I'd received his whatsapp on today's Daily Bread that he had pondered upon. No wonder the parents are always on guard. They start the day with God's words! I hope that I'm able to talk to them and know them personally one day for they've inspired me to be a better parent. 

Setting an example is not the main means of influencing another, it is the ONLY means.

Albert Einstein

I have dark skin

I was born tanned. My mom said she drank kopi-O when she was pregnant with me. My brother is so much fairer than I do. No doubt, my mom drank fresh milk when she was pregnant with my brother. 

I grew up being called different names - hitam manis, Fatimah or Indonesian maid. And now I have new nicknames - Vietnamese, Burmese or the refugee. 

I grew up not having self-confidence because of my skin colour and plainer than the plain Jane features. I was compared to whoever closed to me and my parents were too busy to realise deep down, I was hurt. I felt lonely and hurt. I didn't understand why people didn't like me. But plastic surgery was out of my mind, still is, because I fear pain more than being judged as plain or not pretty. 

Now, it comes to my children. Both my kids are not fair too. Son should be tanned and stout.  But daughter? Errmm...she's going to face what I have gone through. And my husband knows it too well. I was comforted because he knows what to do when our daughter was ignored by our relatives. He carried her around and made her occupied. We didn't want to let her feel neglected or rejected just because she was not fairer or prettier compared to .....

My son asked, "Why does it matter if we are dark?"

"You don't understand. People don't like people who are dark or not pretty," I said.

"Human look at face. God look at the heart," Isaac uttered. 

"Yes, you're right. It's too bad I don't know God when I was a kid. If I know Jesus, I'm sure I won't feel so desperate and depressed," I snapped. 

"Yes. That's why we have the song, 'Jesus loves the little children,....red and yellow, black and white, all are precious in His sight,....,'" Isaac sang. 

I smiled. I thank God because my kids know Jesus at this tender age. They won't feel unloved even if the people around them choose to ignore them - that's because Jesus loves them as they are! 

My son's first week in school

Last time, it was Thangachini and this time, it was Atilah. My son never fails to surprise me!

Last week was the first week of school for my son who has been registered for Year One. Like all mothers, I was excited as well as nervous. But the school was rather strict. Parents were only allowed to come into the school during the first three days. We have to learn to let go though in our minds, there are still too many things which we think our kids couldn't handle. 

So, with my mom's encouragement, I didn't go to visit my son during recess at all on the third day. He had told me very confidently he knows how to buy food for himself. 

On the fourth day of school, I got the chance to meet with his class teacher after school to say good bye. And his teacher took the opportunity to tell me something which I have expected yet have been praying for it not to happen. 

"He likes to talk. He talks too much. All his classmates have been complaining about him," his teacher said. 

😰😰

I smiled. "Yes. He likes to talk." I warned him in front of his teacher and his teacher said, "Yes. You cannot talk so much. Otherwise, I'll put you in a 'special seating'." 

I smiled and said goodbye to the teacher.

That's my son. It was just the first week and his teacher has changed his seating for three times. Teachers thought that he won't be able to communicate with students from other races but they didn't know that my son is truly 1 Malaysia boy! He can speak to whoever sitting beside him be it an Indian or Malay. 

And today, teacher changed his seating again because he has been talking too much with Atilah. 

Yet he is very happy.

"I've two new friends today!" 

"Oh, that's great! How did you make friends with them? ...??? Teacher changed your place again?" 

"Yes!"

😬😰😰

Belligerent, proud and ignorant young drivers

I live in Setapak and it is very close to TAR COLLEGE. Needless to say, this place has been turned into a city with condos by developers to meet the demands of property investors. Most of the condos here are rented out to students thus, our neighbours are mostly students from other states. I have had very friendly students as my neighbours but that was many years ago. Nowadays, many have grown tired of greeting people and become expressionless. What's worse is - they drive dangerously. Some are simply belligerent and ignorant, ignoring one-way or no entry signs as well as coming out from junctions and expecting you to avoid them. 

I remembered having my first car when I was 25. That was my dad's 20 years old Toyota Corolla. Later on, I bought a second hand Kancil with all my savings and a loan from my dad. A car was something so precious to us, we drive with utmost care. But nowadays, parents give cars, especially new ones to college children. How puffed up these kids are! They speed even in the condo itself! What are they trying to prove? You don't understand. I do hope the parents will examine their kids driving skill before letting them drive out to harm the lives of others.

My son starts his primary one!

My son has started primary one. 󾌥

I was more nervous than he did. Well, I am always the nervous type. Afraid of being late to school, afraid of getting stuck in the jam, afraid of this and that...

Isaac on the other hand, is a happy go lucky person. After the first day, he came back telling me, "Teacher said, tomorrow all parents cannot sit in the canteen. You all should go far far away to see us eat only."

Me: So, I don't need to go to school to see you? Are you sure you know how to buy food?

Isaac: Yes la.

Yet, today my mom and I went to school and waited till his recess time. When he saw us, he asked us to go far far away. Then he lined up to buy food. When we reappeared, he quickly hid the junk food he had bought under the table. My mom assured him that I won't scold him for buying junk food. Then only he took it out to eat. What a boy! 

I was mad when I saw him buying junk food. What a waste of money! But my mom said that I have been too strict with him and that makes him wanting to hide whatever "secrets" from me and that's dangerous. 󾍂 

My mom said she never controlled what my brother and I bought to eat when we were kids. Why do that to my son? He needs to have his childhood memory of "junk food" before accepting that they are just junk. Haiii...quite true. I don't eat junk food now. I've had my share when I was a kid and now, I hate junk food. They just make you look horrible with lots of colouring! 󾌿

Maybe I should let go a bit...a bit only. 󾌵